The Stages of Bullying
Posted: February 04, 2020
There are four stages of bullying that we teach to our students at Arrow ATA Martial Arts.
1. The bully picks on you and you ignore it. Now keep in mind we don't mean say nothing on this stage. Our version of ignoring the bully is using our first two bully defense power phrases.
2. The bully picks on you again and you take a stand. In this stage we teach our students the third power phrase. This is when we tell the bully flat out that we don't like what they are doing and not to do it anymore.
3. The bully does not listen and continues to bully you. Now is when our students would use their fourth power phrase and report the bullying. Bullying in school must be reported to the teacher, principal and parents.
4. In stage for the bully does not listen to anyone and bullies you again. The bully is now showing that they are not going to adhere to anyones rules and won't stop with warnings. Think about this for a second. The teacher, principal, child and likely their own parents have told them not to do this again and they do it anyway. They are really telling all of these people that they don't care what they say and that they will do what they want anyway. Now the bullying has to stop somehow. We would use are final power phrase, which asks the bully if they are saying they want to fight, and let them know we are not afraid of them.
Many times the bully realizes at this point how far you are willing to go to stop them and decides to pick on an easier target. It is not often we reach this stage but when we do it is crucial to be confident in your ability. We find when people don't believe they can physically protect themselves they don't stand up for themselves verbally. Out of the fear that it may turn physical. That is why we always say the best form of confidence is self-defense confidence.